One of the upsides of our jobs is that pretty much everyone gets excited when they start talking about bachelor/ette parties. We've heard about the good, the bad, and the ugly, and after a weekend of catching up with guy friends (and eating cookies from Levain Bakery) we wanted to share some thoughts from them on what's made a great bachelor party -- we think you'll be surprised:
- It's about your friend, not about girls. We've been shocked by the number of times we've had this conversation: Guy looks around to see who's watching, lowers his voice, and says, "I'll deny I ever said this, and it's not like I didn't enjoy normal bachelor parties ... but ... best bachelor party I ever went to was a guys' weekend in the woods where we just hung out." To all of them: You're not alone!
- Doing something to get to know the other dudes - useful. Our favorite easy suggestion: "One time we went around at dinner and had everyone talk about how they met the groom and their most embarrassing memory with him. It made it less weird to be around a whole bunch of guys you didn't really know."
- Thoughtfulness matters. Girls don't corner the market on this, and guys appreciate personalized planning around doing things they like just as much (if not more) than we do. Whether it was reservations at their favorite restaurant, organizing the best bachelor party activity (this varied...) or just incorporating old jokes from college, they do actually notice and care.
- ...And importantly, do something for him that he would enjoy that he wouldn't do for himself. Whatever that is. This is the one time it's important to let someone else take control because they will (if they do it right) know better than you do what that thing is.
We'll continue to update this list -- so let us know if there's anything we've missed!